Gods of Egypt

It's garishly colored, cluttered, but without any Pokémon. What is this? (31.07.2016)

When I was thinking about how I should review this movie, I looked at the reviews of the newish Clash of the Titans, to which I gave four stars back then. But then I realized that one star was given to Gemma Arterton, who showed off in any way possible. Here, there were not enough chicks for my eyeballs. There were some, but nothing that would dazzle you. On the other hand, it is exactly what you might imagine. Only with the difference that Alex Proyas is not low-grade, and so he turned Gods of Egypt not only into a fantasy, but at times into a sci-fi. And I have to say that I didn’t mind. A pleasant and pretty movie wind down that is story-wise crazier by the minute. And that’s good. Because you don’t know beforehand what you will get. (25.05.2016)

I expected hell, I got a passable average. The 140 million budget is evident in the film, the production design is really lavish and the whole thing looks much more interesting and atmospheric than in the trailers, unfortunately the visual effects are still crap. It's also nice to note that Gods of Egypt is ultimately more of a fairy tale than gritty and serious-looking fantasy, so some naivety and occasional illogic can be forgiven. The story moves surprisingly fast not only because every now and then the setting changes or a new and usually well-done monster appears, but also because of the likeable characters and, within reason, good actors. Gerard Butler's villain is fine, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau is even better as a good god who needs to grow up a bit, and there are some very nice actresses milling around. So I'm not ashamed to say I had a pretty good time. I won't say it's a good film, but it serves as a spectacular cinema washout without any problems. (15.05.2017)

Wie begeht man kommerziellen Selbstmord. 1) Man wähle ein Thema, das einige Igor Chaun-Fans interessieren wird. 2) Man nehme ein Drehbuch von den Jungs, die Dracula regelrecht versaut und Vin Diesel haben Hexen jagen lassen. 3) Man besetze das Ganze mit knochentrockenen Schauspielern und bei denjenigen, die nicht allzu unbeholfen hinüberkommen, schreiben Sie absurde Textzeilen und ziehen ihnen einen Kartoffelsack über. 4) Man berufe einen Regisseur, welcher das Budget in eine Show mit unglaublich überkandidelten digitalen Sets auflöst, in denen nahezu keine Kamerabewegung natürlich erscheint. Der Rest ergibt sich schon von sich selbst. Nach einer Stunde hat es mir keinen Spaß mehr bereitet, über diese höllische Naivität zu lachen, die sämtlichen ihren Charme bereits verloren hatte. Ja sogar die Parade aufgedunsener Brüste und weißer, fein sauberer ägyptischer Gottheiten macht das ganze um keinen Strich barmherziger. Dies ist der absurdeste Blockbuster des Jahres 2016, gar keine Frage. (20.01.2017)

An opulent fantasy with great actors and unbelievable drive. The ultra-baddy Butler enjoys his every sentence and the catchphrase-spouting Thwaites/Coster-Waldau duo isn’t too bad either. Elodie Yung is damn hot and more than suitable as the goddess of love. Action like in a video game, but with some great ideas and the CGI environment (jungle/desert/underworld) changes so often that it doesn’t get boring. A nice surprise and I’d gladly watch it again. Proyas is good at fairytales too. P.S.: Grampa Rush is cool. I am not one God, I am all gods! (02.03.2016)

Whoever was expecting a fiasco after the trailer, got it. A film that is a mess of all sorts of things and yet you remember nothing from it (except maybe Courtney Eaton – and not really because of her acting). The generational refresh in the style of The Mummy is boring, predictable and, above all, incredibly badly made. The beautiful production design, the costumes and the exceptional colour work are completely wasted thanks to the crazy visual effects and the weird work with camera and light. Alex Proyas has always been seen as a visionary director, so it's hard to guess why he made the worst mythological fantasy in years. Gerard Butler was traditionally entertaining, but otherwise a complete waste of time and it doesn't even work as guilty pleasure. Bless The Mummy and Prince of Persia, they are more moderate and clearer films. (20.07.2016)

Wenn Sie sich gerne ab und zu eine beliebige Folge vom TV-Hercules oder Xena ansehen und wenn Ihnen die absichtlich einfache Naivität und die Zänkereien von Sterblichen und Göttinnen und Göttern (von denen man auch Sprüche aus dem 21. Jahrhundert hört) Spaß machen, ist Gods of Egypt genau das Richtige für Sie. Dieser Film ist nämlich nicht mehr als eine erholsame Fantasie, die sich zum Glück nicht ernst nimmt. Schade, dass der Film nicht kürzer ist und dass er keine interessantere Besetzung hat (es dominiert natürlich Geoffrey Rush in der Rolle vom Gott Ra, der mit seinem Sonnenschiff die flache Welt umkreist und die Sonne hinter sich herschleppt). Eine tolle Musik von Marco Beltrami! (26.02.2016)

A thorough lesson in exaggerated ambition and the negative effect of overblown visuals on the nature of the viewer's experience. Few contemporary films have so stirred in me the dilemma of whether Hollywood requires audiences to go to the cinema to see its expensive, highly marketed products because of what they say, or because of how they say it. Gods of Egypt, from a (formerly) A-list director, applies a huge amount of cliché and genre certainty to form the skeleton of its plot, only to be treated without a second thought to visual effects that look inadequate for the budget, unemotional fight or romantic interludes, two famous actors' faces, and a bunch of B-movie slow-motion or sped-up scenes that are rather counterproductive and often uninteresting and irrelevant in relation to the story. What the film can be credited with, however, is certainly its action-oriented audiovisual verve, which throughout its surprisingly short 120 minutes makes it at least a worthy product of unpretentious and mindless cinematic entertainment. Not in the style of last year's Mad Max, which manoeuvred on a far more coherent yet far less hackneyed plot platform, but rather as the formally unbridled masturbation of its creator, who had seen a lot of similar fantasies and tried, for more money and at a faster pace, to create the most modern and honest sibling for them. What would the Wachowskis, for example, have given for something like this in the sci-fi field last year. 60% (06.03.2016)

When I went to the cinema to see Gods of Egypt, I was expecting a heroic audiovisual orgy with nothing to surprise me. And I wasn’t too far off the mark, as this film more or less fits the previous description. It's a truly colourful film, with a large number of imaginative elements that both help and hurt it. I rolled my eyes considerably during the scenes in which the gods are transported in chariots by birds and bugs, and the same was true of their Terminator-like appearance. On the other hand, I was probably most impressed by the line with Geoffrey Rush, who elevated the overall acting quality. A film to fill an evening, with which one of the most overused critical clichés can be applied: “It neither impresses nor offends.” (14.03.2016)

I didn’t have high hopes for this film, but it surprised me by not being as bad as I expected. It was a cross between Prince of Persia and Ancient Egyptian Transformers. Gerard Butler and Kingslayer were excellent, and I even had a few laughs. I wasn't exactly blown away by it, but I was having fun the whole time, so a 3+. (24.08.2016)

Digital Hollywood effects do nothing for me, really. But this tasteless piece of screenwriting offers basically nothing apart from that. I'm actually not surprised that the traditionally bad Gerard Butler is prancing about here. Geoffrey Rush, however, should have spared us his participation in this soulless project. (25%) (12.08.2022)